RON SCHALOW: Is Rob Port Really A Cambodian Water Buffalo?

We can’t discount the possibility.

I know you’re saying, “I wouldn’t read his shoe size.” Or, “Who cares about Rob Snort,” but somebody has to keep an eye the scamp, so he doesn’t totally get away with personal shots of venom. Like his sucker punch of Jim Shaw.

Shaw’s Saturday column in the Fargo Forum was an unambiguous middle finger of truth to the pompous lawmakers at the Capitol who couldn’t find it in their hearts, spleens or brains to grant discrimination protection to ALL people.

Everybody. But no, they sliced transexual humans off the bill, assuming that LGBT supporters would accept less than 100 percent.

You know exactly who in the Legislature I’m talking about. They run the joint. I’m sure some are good people.

Republicans had the no vote locked up. But since Democratic leadership has some integrity, they also voted no. Except the Democrats did it to say that the bill was unacceptable, not that transexual people are unacceptable. Republicans felt the opposite.

Shaw writes this headline and it’s clearly a high — just a bit inside —fastball aimed at the red caps.

“Shaw: Bigotry is alive and well in Bismarck”

But Port was puzzled and couldn’t grasp the meaning of the English words. Nobody else in North Dakota missed Jim’s point, but Port never lets his misunderstanding of the facts stop him from inventing a rift to ride.

Then he can write a provocative nonsensical headline, and InForum will publish the first few paragraphs and link to to the Forum-owned Sayanythingblog so you can savor the ending.

“Port: Is North Dakota’s first openly gay lawmaker an anti-gay bigot?”

Of course, he is, you nitwit. Just as Donald Jexodus Trump is a smart and sassy trauma nurse at Mayo.

Then Port uses a thinly veiled grade school debating technique to conjure up a reason to do a smear job on Shaw.

Rob reaches as deep as he is able and draws a flimsy false conclusion, to demonstrate the limited nature of his wit and pick a fight with an opponent who is writing in the heavyweight division and Port’s best-worn line is, “Your mileage will vary,” followed by, “But I digress.”

Then, he tosses Rep. Josh Boschee and Rep. Ruth Buffalo into the middle of this vindictive egging.

I should say, “left-wing media darling Rep. Ruth Buffalo,” as the little hedgehog put it. Women, or at least women as Port imagines them, can only be unaccomplished “media darlings.”

Rep. Buffalo is a hat trick for Robbie. A woman. A Native. And a Native woman of action and deeds. The white nationalist hyenas who try to guard Port’s blog comment section have a beef with all three categories and we snowflake cucks. None of them are good people.

So he’ll be going after Ruth on a regular basis, just as POVNow has, and I assume Scott Hennen. Scott’s Facebook page just makes me sad, so I’ve stopped looking. How far can a man’s brain dissolve before it’s too late for treatment? It could be just a frayed wire, easily repaired with a needle nose pliers. Or not.

Port is also enamored with Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, another media darling. She’s a full-on socialist, and another Sen. Joseph McCarthy, according to lying Rob. Both assertions are moronic, defamatory and misogynistic, but when you’re shameless, anything goes.

It could be that Port has found a replacement obsession in AOC after a hard landing with his hateful devotion to Heidi Heitkamp. Fingers crossed.

Below is the real Rob Port. A tool for the government he claims to detest and a stenographer for anything pro-oil or anti-Native.

A young women protestor, behind the razor wire and cement barriers where a water cannon drenched her in the 20-degree weather, stood on the Blackwater Bridge with the others developing hypothermia.

Suddenly, she nearly had her forearm blown apart, and the images weren’t pretty. It was apparent that the wheels of PR called for a Portweasel. Who else would just blindly publish a one-sided story without verification?

“How can we get this story out? Rob Port?” Major Amber Balken, a public information officer with the North Dakota National Guard, said. “This is a must report.”

Cecily Fong, a public information officer with the North Dakota Department of Emergency Services, replied saying she would ‘get with’ the blogger for wider dissemination.” — C.S. Hagen, High Plains Reader

After fulfilling his propaganda duties a hundredfold, Rob snapped.

“Instead of building a pipeline, let’s just sell the oil to the hobbits. I’m serious. We could get Gandalf to ride Shadowfax to North Dakota once every week or so, then he could wave his magic staff about and transmogrify the oil into delicious crumpets that then could be sold to the fine, furry-footed folks of Hobbiton, who I’m certain would love North Dakota’s transmogrified crumpet exports.”

Everybody knows that Gandalf would never come to North Dakota after what happened in Zap. So Port’s suggestion is just silly.

Even now, it doesn’t appear that Port has recovered from his trip to Dorn and the Iron Islands. Someone should keep an eye on the future communications director for Trump. Don won’t take him if he has stabilized. The loonier the better.

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