RON SCHALOW: White Nationalists Of North Dakota Beware

White nationalists and their ideological cousins on the far alt-right won’t like this.

As climate change projections for North Dakota have shown, the state will warm; we’ll have enough moisture.

Not so bad, eh?

We’ll be an island of relative calm, at least in the early stages of warming, if we don’t immediately act to remove the excess greenhouse gases in our atmosphere and oceans.

There will be more flooding, but our center-of-the-continent location and general geographic makeup will allow us to avoid the major destruction that other parts of the country and world will suffer. No hurricanes, cyclones, wildfires, earthquakes, high sea level or tsunamis for us.

So where do you suppose people will go when they tire of living by the warm and volatile ocean or in the dry forests? What will they do when the Atlantic is shin high in their dining room?

How do droughts followed by mudslides sound? Then there are sinkholes and volcanoes. Name the disaster.

We’ll still see the occasional tornado or blizzard, but those are old hat. Even on a normal day, an old hat might fly by.

A person could go farther north into Canada, but only so far. The permafrost will be melting, making the ground unstable and spitting massive amounts of CO2 and methane into the atmosphere from decayed plant and animal matter that have been in a frozen state. Plus who knows what dormant bacteria and viruses will find new life in the air, along with the requisite wooly mammoth?

Everyone with resources to move will be going to the less-affected territories of land worldwide, and we’ll be one of those spots. If people are smart, they’ll load up the U-Haul next week and head to Antler, or Killdeer, or Kathryn, N.D.

All of Taxachusetts and every liberal in New York will set up shop in the Peace Garden State. Border to border. Floridians for sure. It will be a white supremacist nightmare because every shade of brown human will be on Interstate 94 or Interstate 29 with a bead on Bismarck, Minot and Fargo. Or Oakes, Steele and Velva, N.D.

We’ll be passing out balaclavas and 100 SPF sunscreen at the turnstiles.

All of the religions of the world will put down stakes. Every ethnicity, every language and every culture will be walking down Main Street in your town. Oh, the Facebook videos to come. If you need a downtown, call Gov. Burgum.

Maybe Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez will show up with a bunch of Democratic Socialists and they’ll set up an RV community in the Bank of North Dakota parking lot. All of the medicinal marijuana smoke draws a rather dodgy mob that spooks the Kirkwood mall turkeys.

All of Hollywood and San Francisco could appear in stages, including transexuals and other non binary people, and they can fit on our western regions if a direction is an issue.

All of this will happen if we choose to ignore the inevitable. If a person is treading water in the ocean and an island appears, there is only one option for survival. Swim.

But since North Dakota is connected, literally, to the rest of the world, there will be massive changes to the food supply. Corporations may need to stop clearing the rain forests to grow aloe plants. Will an aloe shortage cause riots in the flax fields?

Will there be enough beer and rum? Will bees survive and pollinate the crops as usual, or will they go the way of many insect species?

How long can the oceans provide? Overfishing and acidification of the water have stunted the seafood supply. Will a tuna sandwich still be a thing?

Many species of plants and animals will die? Some will simply move, but there is little time to adapt. Millions of years of evolution don’t matter when critters have less than 10 minutes to pack their bag.

Massive migrations of people will take place that will dwarf our fake crisis at the southern border. The U.S. had been meddling in Central America for hundreds of years, causing wars and mountains of death.

This time, American cocaine consumers are at fault for the violence. South American traffickers are especially using Guatemala and Honduras as a hub for drug shipments north, so they didn’t walk here for the free stuff. They are swimming and our president is trying to push them under.

Our crops will have to deal with new pests and weeds, even if there might be temperatures that allow for two plantings a season. And will farmers be able to get parts for their equipment or even new machines?

I don’t know.

A million things are currently going on or about to transpire as the planet gets warmer, and most of them are bad. It has all happened in such a short window, relative to billions of years of earth time, that our ability to adjust to a new world will be strained.

Technology will help, but not without the political will to address the climate calamity, instead of Donald Trump’s Space Force. A brilliant move says toady Kevin Cramer.

Almost all of government in North Dakota is in favor of pushing this planet off the ledge just so they don’t have to admit anything. So, there’s that. True statespeople.

Diversity is a dirty word in some circles, but the circles should prepare to meet a flamboyant Cuban-American cross-dresser because he’s moving in next door to every bigot we’ve got. Anyone different will do.

One thought on “RON SCHALOW: White Nationalists Of North Dakota Beware”

  • Diana Green March 1, 2019 at 9:47 pm

    It would be a huge shock to some of the thick-headed North Dakotans to have such an influx of OMG aware people in their midst. Maybe it’s not so bad as it sounds, but I do it in a flash, #1 if I had the money, #2 if I wanted to be that far from salt water. In my funeral arrangements today I made sure that some of my ashes will be in the salt water of the ocean for sure. And the rest, maybe I’ll have my daughter plant a flower in the urn and live on in another form. Tah Dah!!


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